Hoorah!

No more brown spotting today. Bliss :) Baby is fine, and I am happy and excited.

Still wishing this MS would go away...dammit.

Ultrasound #1

So today was the day I was so nervous about, our first ultrasound.

I woke up and still had brown spotting, and my morning sickness had reduced so I barely even cared about it anymore. This concerned me as I thought "oh here we go..all my symptoms are disappearing"

Got to the clinic and sat down, not needing to pee at all like usual, instead just wanting to vomit all the water back up. I actually didn't get through the whole 1L, after about 750mL I was so close to bringing it back up I dared not drink anymore!

My name was called, turned around and it was the woman who had told us about our first miscarriage, and she was not very nice. Went into the room and she was much friendly than our first meeting, perhaps it was to do with the "2 Previous Miscarriages" written on my form.
She asked about if I was having any bleeding, and I said I was having some brown discharge and she said, like we all get told, that it's just old blood so not to be concerned.

I don't even remember if it was me or her who undid my pants, but she had the towel and gel done so fast. Then she put the scanny thingy (noooo idea what the wands name is) on my tummy and I held my breathe.

I saw the blob come up, first sigh of relief as there is something there, then I saw it. That beautiful little patch that flickers, first thing she said "Theres the heartbeat".
YAY! Our baby is alive! :D Her heartbeat was 119BPM, i say her as thats what me and DP reckon haha.
She was only measuring 6 weeks 1 day, but the tech didn't seem concerned. I wasn't too worried either as that just means baby is going more by my Ovulation date than my LMP dates.

I'm still getting brown discharge, and I'm a little nervous still about it but seeing that image today made me stress a LOT less. Tech said she couldn't see any bleeding, and it might just be implantation bleed. Phew.

Midwife appointment on Thursday will be a lot better. :) Thank you everyone who had their fingers crossed! We have made it to this point, now lets keep chugging.

Update

Thanks to the ladies who are reassuring me saying it isn't always the end, I just find it so hard after the last two to ever see brown discharge as anything but the beginning of the end.

This morning I checked and had a small brown clump of discharge, stringy and darker than last night. I will keep an eye on it as time goes on.

I just wish that if it was going to end, that this damn morning sickness would go away. I am feeling nauseous 24/7 and haven't pooped in a few days as everything keeps coming up not down. 
I am not sure how I am going to cope at work, Friday I left thinking I was going to throw up at any point and that was my early finish day. Today is a late finish so who knows.

Will update when/if more happens. So down at the moment I just don't even know what to do/say.

Crushed

Went toilet and my discharge was brown. Sigh. Here we go again. :(
I was starting to get excited with the morning sickness (lasting all day) and for our scan on Tuesday. Now it will just be another scan to confirm the misery.

It's here...

It's officially here. Morning sickness. Bleeeeeeeeergh. It started yesterday at 6w 1d by LMP.

I got it yesterday while still recovering from my flu and thankfully made it to the bathroom in time. In preparation for today I bought some Morning Sickness tablets and bought some crackers and ginger beer.

Woke up this morning, ate a few crackers before getting out of bed. Got up and had my morning sickness tablets, and attempted to eat breakfast. Baby did not agree with breakfast, so I had some ginger beer.
Now I just keep feeling little waves of uneasyness. I think I actually felt better yesterday when I just vomited and let it out.

In 50 minutes I have to go back to work for the first time this week, and I am extremely nervous that I will feel even worse there.

I reckon the worst part of it all is not knowing when it will end, how long will my MS last? Is it just a fleeting visit to let me know things are ok, or is it here for the long haul?

It does make me feel much better about this pregnancy, I didn't have MS with the last two so perhaps it's a sign saying this time is different. :) I will take that and clutch it with two hands.

I am slightly nervous about Tuesdays scan, but also excited. I just wish it would hurry up! DP is working away that day so I will have to get up early to drive and pick him up, then drive back again and drop him back off. That journey back will either be very solemn, or very happy.

Does anyone have any tips for MS, how to deal with it etc? Everything is appreciated!

Week 5/6 Update

So I missed this on Friday, I've been sick and busy. :(

How Far Along? 5w + 6 days

How big is baby? Started at about 2mm but is growing bigger every day! So about the size of an apple seed.

How I'm feeling? Still nervous, but bit more confident! Would be better if wasn't sick and constantly worrying about food/drink.

Weight? Unsure.

How I'm changing? Bloated all time, tummys firmer, and feeling more yucky. 

What I miss? Eating leftovers, Subway, KFC, relaxing on a girls night and not hiding things from them.

Symptoms? Sick after food, pee all the time, sick if I don't eat... 

Aversions? Not sure yet, but i'm enjoying being able to eat what I can atm.

Meds? Folic acid + Iodine + Iron still, bought Elevit in the groceries other day but it was the wrong one! :(

Appts? Blood tests all came back ok, went to midwifery centre and signed up with midwive. The one i had in past is going away April/May, when i'm due, so she is looking after me now until she knows when she's leaving then we'll transfer me to someone else in the centre. She will still be able to see me and help out though which is great. Have appt with her again next Thursday.

Also, next week is my first ultrasound. Eeek. Nervous that i'll start bleeding again like last time and so will know what the scan will show, but excited to see hows it going and if its the right size etc. I will be exactly 7 weeks (by LMP) on the day. 

I think I'm dying...

I must have caught the man flu.

Last few days I've had a very sore throat, then last night as I held a girls night at my house, I went to bed thinking I was dying.
I have been drinking OJ lately as it keeping my throat relatively painfree, so last night I thought "Right. OJ + "vodka" it is :)" as obviously I have not told anyone.
My throat started feeling a bit worse as the night went on, eventually to the point where I thought I was going to vomit and couldn't breath properly.

Then my nose started up, and has blocked itself so bad I couldn't even blow out or suck in the tiniest piece of air, I felt like my nose has closed up.

I began to cry. I didn't know what to do, how to fix it, or how to get to sleep! And that's all I wanted, SLEEP. :(

So here I am, waking up and nodding off all night thinking any minute now I will wake up dead from suffocation. My lips have taken a beating from having to constantly have my mouth open.

Today was not much better, blocked nose all day and sore throat off and on, not to mention how sick I felt after stuffing myself at lunch today. Whether that was overfull stomach or morning sickness rearing I am not sure.

I hope I wake up tomorrow with a clear nose and the ability to breathe again.